Baby and Deciding to Go For My Degree

If interested in going to school, I highly recommend going for your education before having children.

But if you are like me and wanted a major career change after marriage, pregnant or with bébé, hello kindred spirit!

Not to deter but only to bring awareness, you are possibly about to embark in years of eye twitches, too many years of burnout, pushing through mental blocks, sweat, tears, failures, success' and a dip in the bank account. And, an incredible amount of guilty comments from others. It would have been so nice to just be taken care or at least had more support while pregnant. And after having a baby-well, thats a whole other story. I was pregnant with twins and my wood shop teaches was putting glue in nose area saying it can't hurt the pregnancy. I dunno. I. am sure it had nothing to with that. But trades school, welding, carpentry, CNC machining, etc from 8:00am-4:00pm was just the most opportune time to go back to school while pregnant;P The thing is the course was ending and I as already 8 years into volunteering at Mount Boucherie and she was going to retire. in the Cosmetology program. So I thought that was my best time to go for it as she was timing to it for when I graduated. No regrests. It wasn't the twins time.

I hope you are nothing like me because I did it the long ass way.

I would recommend more balance and learning to be present with whatever task at hand you find yourself in. NO regrets actually. I love my life. I have my daughter. The best gift ever. And she came a week before my birthday. She as due to my birthday. I was worried she would be born after mine. I always wanted her to feel special.

But that is just the way I am. Blending it all together.

Let it marinate.

Always a list of 100 things needed to be done and checking things off on the daily. Like all of us trying to learn. Grow. And be better. The student / work or /child(s) life.

Let's hammer this out.

The key factor is being present. The green nature room at UBC-Chefs Kiss.

I think of Kim Kardashian. Heck, I know she has nanny's.

But if celebs can do it I can do it. We can do it!

Statistics have shown people on average change their careers 3-5 times in their life.

While I was happy I had a successful business bringing in $4000 a month clear on my own working part time in my salon, I decided to embark in the journey of giving back.

Naturally, I started to volunteer at the high school hair academy to see if its really something I enjoyed. Five years later I decided to go for my degree. It didn't even cross my mind. I was 28! Me, back to school? The teacher said she went back at 32 so I was inspired and started the slow process of upgrading my English first.

I am a huge advocate for dipping your feet in the water before going full tilt and getting educated. I see so many who jump in, pay thousands for a course and drop out half way. It has always boggled my mind a bit. But hey. A process is a process and there is no wrong or right path.

But for me, I like to offer my time for free and go in for a half day of observation, at least. If you just know what you want, I think that is beautiful.

Semper Veritas: "Always True". And, 'Nosce te ipsum', Know Thyself. Latin phrases I saw plastered in my High School growing up and remember.

I had to learn to know myself to be able to stay true over the years.

Simply put, I can not afford to lose thousands of dollars.

Lots of people want a career change because they are not happy where they are.

Firmly, I believe happiness comes from within however, if someone worked countless hours in a job they don't enjoy, how can they just waste that money they have dreadfully worked for? With countless ways that our money is spent, possibly unbeknownst to us, its important to get a good grasp on finances and not go full tilt without testing the waters fully.

Fast forward. I loved inspiring youths and they seem to really like me. They had a huge buffet gathering for me, rich with diverse types of food from different cultures, made me gifts and bought me a Pandora bracelet. They became my clients and friends after they graduated and I am still in contact with them today.

I am so proud of their success in the hair industry! Some were murdered. Some were prostitutes I tried to get help for. Some were 18 years of age and in their 18th foster home with allowance for one weekly shower. They come from mostly other schools so they don't wander the school at break but hang out in the class as if a sanctuary. I can't wait to have a whole chill out, creative, mindfulness area with plants.

Some were beaten at home. Thrown down stairs. Cutters and bullied. I always advocated for the bullied. The underdog. I have strong classroom management skills and am a intuitive teacher in the classroom, nixing any bullying behavior in the bud as I was bullied in many slow salons I worked in and its an awful experience when you feel you don't have anyone like-minded in your corner. Of course, that whole thing comes with a lot of work so I am huge on classroom working together to better the school community. And model empathy and mindfulness to hopefully mirror those neurons in youths' so they will understand we are so diverse have gifts to offer.

It is so rewarding to see the students I taught post their work on Instagram and soar to the top with their extraordinary work and obvious passion. They too inspired me. Some had huge influence in helping out in the community such as with the homeless. I was inspired on the daily and collaborated on charitable adventures such as hair cuts for Cancer awareness.

I couldn't help to feel like they were like my little sisters I had the privilege to guide.

Trying three years to get pregnant.

Miscarriage of twins. Pregnant again.

Eight hour days on my feet chopping wood, bending metal and working on the CNC machine while 8 months pregnant.

The first year of bliss with bebe.

Two months off from work. 7 months off from school. Back to school and then a breaking hard with a failing marriage.

I went full tilt in school and did my best in my health and family life with the best of my knowledge at the time. Staying up late nights googling how to save my marriage was like another job. It led me to my friend and life coach who taught me how to find the happiness within. It took a year to finally get it after silent retreat and practice. But it was too late to save my marriage and it takes two to tango.

Although, the school was hard on the relationship, I would not change a thing because I do believe whatever is meant to be is meant to be. I learned so much about myself. My likes. My boundaries. Most importantly, I chartered through the depths of mental and spiritual strength and decoded my own personal combination to abundance and happiness!

In an ancient Egyptian book I read called, 'Fingertips of the Gods', by Graham Hancock, it taught me that to reach a higher state, one must go through a lot of hard times if you will.

So many have come before me. I am but a small speck in the sand. But I feel like I have wandered and conquered my own mountain of sorts. I see the world through eyes not of wonder again. The depressed yucky feeling is gone because I have learned new mental, emotional and spiritual skills. I see that I create everything I want and need! The World is my canvas and I am the painter. I paint it a happy prosperous place. Although so many suffer, I do what I can with what I can to give back and help and hope if anything to inspire personal responsibility and empowerment.

All I want to do is help one. If you find my story at all inspiring, I hope you embark and just take that darn first step today!

Once you create some inertia, the engine will propel you forward and you will learn so much about yourself.

Its taken me longer then most. But in Summer 2018, I am convocating! I will be so proudly walking across that stage.

Me! The person who teachers thought was destined to flunk out of high school in a downward spiral. The only girl in trades school. The misunderstood one. The hair teacher taking auto in college. Me. The math failure who realized I was a visual learner at age 30 and received 100% in second year advanced mathematical electronics and robotics. The person who had tutors and stayed at lunch for help in math. Who spent 4 hours per night on one question each day. Who was so insecure to ask yet another, 'eye rolling, annoying' question next to all the math whizzes in school. The one who was compared to my Simon Fraisier University on Scholarship Wrestling bro, the graduant with honors math and sport pro. I love him:D

My friends didn't walk the stage. They think its weird that I am.

But I am a teacher determined to figure out what will help that one student. Why that students has mental blocks.

Because I have done so myself and wish someone would have done that for me and helped reduce my moments of feeling worthless due to the fact that my math was absolutely a failure. 50% with bribes and cheating:( So embarrassed. Please teacher! I have a question. Embarrassed to even ask. But I needed to know. Every year was the same. Two days later, I was behind and the rest of the term was an embarrassing tail between my legs blur.

All I needed to know was that I was visual learner.

And you know what. Students shouldn't have to feel ashamed.

Maybe some of us are just not math people!

I am walking on that stage this summer.

Probably will be laughing and balling at the same time.

I hope you make yourself proud.

Go do that thing. Test the waters. Upgrade that one high school class. Just get in the car and drive to the college and ask the one question. Order that high school transcript. Cal the darn high school from your youths' for that darn number to that darn number. Just go do it.

I am wanting that darn dream job. I have been working towards it for years. Then it might be a side course work toward my Ph. D. It is my 50 years old version of me goal. So I will have to take that darn class along with you. Lets just hope to do it happily, balanced and with our mindful presence this time.

Good luck and God Bless you in happiness, health, proseprity and gratitude.

Jessica Tesar